Here are suggestions for helping you work
      on any money issues you may

      have with your partner: Many of these tips can be used when you
      are sharing living costs with family members and others.

      
1. Begin by sharing your financial anxieties
      with your partner. If you feel
      too intimidated to express yourself, you might first want to
      read appropriate sections in my book "Be
      Your Own Financial Therapist" and share it with
      your partner. The book is a good catalyst for opening up the
      subject.

      
2. Assuming you both have anxieties,
      examine your fears in the context of your family money histories. Use the visualization
      on this web site to help you. Your histories have valuable insights
      into the the basis for your fears and ways that you can manage
      them.

      
3. In order to cope with your fears,
      do joint spiritual work around money to better understand the
      nature of money and it's spiritual connection. My book, "Be Your
      Own Financial Therapist" has many cases and insights
      that can help you overcome your anxieties and see the thinking
      that is required to resolve your issues. The best way to get
      the most from this book is to read it together. You can order
      my book on this web site.

      
4. Since money is a form of energy that
      is best used when managed for spiritual growth, you will also
      find it helpful to read together a mutually agreed upon spiritual
      book that helps define who you are and your purpose in life. A book such as this will give you a meaningful
      overview from which you can direct your money with less anxiety.

      
5. Since understanding financial facts
      is an effective way to ground emotions, and solve practical money
      problems, you will find it helpful to examine these facts. When you are working on an issue:

      

        
a. If you are living together and jointly
        managing your finances, draw up your Financial
        Summary using the form and instructions on this web site.
        If you are living together but managing your monies separately,
        you each need to draw up your own Summary.
        
b. review your Summaries together, and
        openly discuss the ways you have been managing your money. Identify
        how your anxieties have affected your management behavior.
        
c. Assuming you have management concerns,
        air them in a loving way. Avoid judging each other. Focus on
        what you need to do to improve your financial position. Keep
        your discussion within the context of your financial facts and
        avoid excessive emotional reactions.

      
6. If you are having trouble controlling
      your expenses, set up a monthly spending goal and monitor it
      together at least weekly. You can
      get instructions for setting up this system in "Be
      Your Own Financial Therapist."

      
7. If you are still unable to resolve
      your issues, you may need a mediator (preferably someone with
      financial skills) to assist you.

      
Tips Archive #1

      
Tips Archive #2
      

      
© 2000, Frederick
      S. Brown. All rights reserved.